What is paragon?
by Handsome Jerk
Summary: A story about the aftermath of the reaper invasion, from the view of an indoctrination theory supporter. This fan fiction will focus more on the psychological aspects of this war, as well as the personal issues the Normandy's crew members have. But this time, Shepard won't be able to go on loyalty missions. In fact, the broken hero tries her best not to need one herself.


Opening your eyes to a bright flash of light was not a nice way to wake up. Especially if your head started hurting like a Krogan had been headbutting you for 3 days straight.

"Shepard!" rang the familiar voice of the tatooed biotic sitting next to the bed, yet she sounded unusually cheerful. "Don't. You. Ever. Do that again"

Shepard's eyes were still closed, the bright light blinding the commander, scars stinging as if they were on fire, every limb throbbing in pain "Do what?" She asked with her voice weak and sore "I can only remember.. I don't even know. There was this kid again.. I died. The citadel blew up and, and, and, " her right hand touched her forehead, gently applying pressure to her temples. This was when she realised bandages were wrapped around most of her upper body.

Jack saw the look on the Commander's face and shook her head

"You looked like they put you through a damn meat grinder. Not even the medi-gel helped a bit. You're one sturdy piece of shit, Shepard. Fucking bleeding all over, crushed about every bone in your body, charred like a piece of coal. And somehow your implants got fried. They had to freakin' surgically remove half that shit from your brain. I thought you're a vegetable for good this time."

Shepard listened carefully to what Jack had to say. However, it did not make any sense to her. She got up and entered the citadel just fine. Yes, a broken rib and a dislocated shoulder, but her barriers had absorbed most of Harbinger's attack. And aboard the citadel, everything was normal. There had been corpses, but no one had attacked her. Except for the illusive man

"ANDERSON!" she exclaimed in shock, opening her eyes wide and jumping up into a sitting position. Not to long after she fell back down, whimpering in pain. Her body was definitely more broken than what she could recall. "That bastard made me shoot Anderson. And I couldn't do anything about it."

"No idea what you're talking about. The admiral never even saw you after we made that mad dash towards the citadel."

Shepard simply couldn't understand what was going on anymore and fell back onto the mattress. She thought she had died, but that was not right. She thought Anderson was dead, but that was wrong too. "Are the reapers gone? Did we wipe them out or control them? Is the citadel still intact? Where are the others? Jack, what the hell is going on? How long was I unconscious?"

The commander sounded nervous and just voiced any of her questions that she had, not even thinking about them herself

"Calm down, Shepard. It's not helping you to annoy the shit out of me. The reapers are mostly gone, as far as I can tell. Citadel.. That's a tough one. One of the arms is in real bad shape. And I mean way bad. But they are already fixing it. The crew is actually up there right now. I'm just down here because.. Uhm.. Well someone had to check on you, and Joker wanted to see the Destiny Ascension again... "

"You were scared, huh?"

"Don't be a fucking Idiot, Shep. I just… you were out of comission for three years. I'm just here because it's a Thursday, " the woman sighed annoyed, but then she smiled as she saw the Commander's shocked reaction "Alright, don't give me that look, I've been messing with ya. I pulled you out of the rubble two weeks ago. Been searching the area for survivors. And maybe I got a little desperate. I... Fucking told you this would happen, didn't I? Fuck, If I hadn't gotten Eezo to.. Sniff on that.. On your stupid-ass N7 hoodie, you would still be lying out there.. And we wouldn't even know!"

The tough attitude she usually kept around others went missing as she talked about how she saved her commander. For a second it almost sounded as if she was sobbing in between words "And I'd still be crawling through… through the piles, searching for you. The two Krogans? They didn't leave a single fucking boulder unturned. Shit, Wrex almost cried when I grabbed you."

She clearly sniffed at the end, so Shepard reached out for her, the bandaged hand softly resting on the biotic's shoulder as she was kneeling next to the Commander.

"I'm alive Jack, " she said, grunting in pain "You did great. Thank you... It's not like.. It's not like you let someone else die while looking for me, " her fingers dug into Jack's vest to endure the pain, but the thumping pain felt excruciating "FUCK!"

"Shepard!"

"Hell, My shoulder! Do some-.." before she could had the chance to start cursing and screaming, her vision went black and she passed out from the pain that was rocking her body to the core.

Jack carefully lifted the Commander's arm to lay it down next to her unconscious body. It was obvious her shoulder was broken, but since she was on painkillers it didn't occur to her that she worsened the fracture with her gesture of affection.

Jack called the medic who immediately took care of Shepard and sent the visitor outside.

"Fuck it. Fuck it all. I ain't dealing with this shit, " she grumbled as kicking the dirt in front of her, whirling around some dust. As the dust settled she had turned around to message a friend she had grown rather fond of in the past few days. "Vega? You up for some booze and getting inked? Shepard woke up, but I.. I just can't deal with it. No. She's out of commission again. So what do you say? Make some use of those alliance dog tags? Alright, see you in two hours."

Later that evening, Jack was leaning on a wall outside a pub that survived the reaper invasion. The building was located at an intersection, one side was partially blasted open. The owner had tried his best repairing it with what resources he could spare, alcohol was reserved for soldiers of either species, as a little token of gratitude for saving the galaxy. There were some civilians that were upset for not being served, but the situation was only temporary and most people just accepted it as a little act of kindness towards the aliens.

The sun slowly inched closer towards the horizon and Jack slowly started feeling a bit chilly, tucking on her jacket to cover some more skin. She flinched, a slight burning sensation radiating through her right shoulder as her still fresh tattoo was rubbed by the jacket. Soon Vega walked around the corner, waving at her, prompting Jack to shove herself away from the wall

"How's Lola?"

"No greeting? No 'Hey Jack, how are you?' Or anything?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"I'm kidding. I'm alright, I'm over it. I don't cry for two hours because I don't have anyone to talk to. Let's get some beer."

"Uhm, alright."

Vega was taken off guard by her casualness. When she called him the situation seemed way worse, as if she needed him. But now everything was alright again? Everything was cool, after letting it sit for a few hours? This woman is loco, he thought. Maybe she was. She's Jack, after all.

At the bar he flashed his dog tags, prompting a scan of his ID before he was allowed to order. The blue light flashed infront of him before the bartender gestured to Jack to show her dogtags, but Vega lifted his hand.

"The walking canvas belongs to me." he said, to which Jack just shot him an annoyed look, before ordering her drink.

They both spent some time together and spoke about their commander's health. However, as Shepard blacked out after a few minutes, there was not much Jack could tell him. And after a while, it was going on her nerves.

"No offense but this is stupid. I'm not gonna sit here and talk about Shepard like every damn day while there's a bunch of drunk people that I could spend my time with, instead."

Before Vega could respond to that, Jack wandered off to talk to a few biotics that had been standing around in a more secluded area.

"Hey nerds! What are you talking about?" Jack asked in her casual way, placing her drink on the table. Looking around to maybe spot familiar faces, she soon came to the realisation that there were more biotics in the alliance than she would like to accept.

"Biotic implants."  
"I'm hooked, go on"  
"We're arguing if I should wait for the new series, or maybe tweak some older ones. I could even get an L2 and have some Salarian fiddle with-."

"Bullshit, girl, " Jack responded before taking a sip of her beer "Don't fuck with implants. You'll fry your brain. I mean.. If you want blood shooting out of your ears when creating a singularity," her fists reached for her head, quickly opening them up infront of her face, gesturing an explosion "Hey, by all means, go ahead. It'd be hilarious."

"Pardon, who are you again? I don't see why I should listen to a runt like you."

"Ohoho, kid, you don't want to mess with me. Now listen carefully, cause I ain't gonna repeat myself: An L2 is always a dangerous tool. I've seen many people with those. No matter how powerful these make you, you don't want the brain damage they come with. AH! Quiet, " she ordered as the young woman infront of her inhaled, wanting to speak up about her opinion "Lecture's not over yet. L2's will never out power anything past an L3-X1. Reason is, the original L3 implants were underperforming for the user's safety. L3-X1's are so advanced that you can safely reach the L2's level of power. Or you can go for an L5. High power, high safety, non-experimental.."

The soldiers looked at her in confusion, puzzling about the source of Jack's knowledge about the newer models that were still rarely used. She shrugged:

"I teach special biotics. Most are L3-X1's, some are L5's. I thought about upgrading to an L5 myself but I don't know if those are stronger or weaker than that prototype I got. It's a bit complicated"

The biotics were silent for a minute. All this information needed to be processed, they were completely changing their opinions on the implants the alliance had to offer. Jack smiled proudly seeing that she could keep those kids from making a mistake.

"You could also get some Asari to talk about cross species options. They have some interesting ones.. But yeah, I'd rather have a weak implant than a dangerous one."

One of them, however, rose his hands, claiming he didn't need any advice on new implants, as he already was a prodigy and currently the strongest biotic on earth. It may have been a flight of testosterone that made him brag infront of the females, mixed with a lot of alcohol, but he was adamant about it.

Jack snorted, trying to stiffle her laugh. Telling him that he wasn't even the strongest biotic in this bar didn't make the situation any better.

When the bright blue energy rippled through the air, slowly warping around his arm, Jack looked up in surprise, before a mug of beer hit her square in the face. The force of the impact made her stumble back, pain immediately shooting through her entire body. Even before the mug shattered on the floor she could smell the rusty scent of blood in the air.  
Immediately blood started seeping out of the gash, and it would only start to pour faster as time went by. It took her a few seconds as she was completely dumbstruck, but once she realised what just happened Jack held out her arm, blue sparks snapping around it as she completely negated the gravity around the other biotic. He was helplessly floating up for a brief moment before Jack slammed down her hand, crashing him into the table with such strength that it gave in under the impact. She decided to go all out on him, the other biotics just staring in awe, but suddenly she was grabbed from behind, two strong arms wrapping around her chest from below her arms "Let go of me, Asshole!" she exclaimed, trying to elbow the attacker. She stomped on his feet defensively, but without effect. Soon her efforts were made all but useless when he took her into a full Nelson.

"Calm down, Jack! He's not worth it!"

"Let go, Vega! I want to deal with him!"

"If I let you go, you'd tear this kid apart. You really want to be charged with murder?"

"He.. Argh… Deserves it."

Her thrashing caused the blood to pour from the wound, running down her cheek, staining her shirt and jacket. Vega got most of it, her cheek rubbing against his chest as she tried to struggle free from his grip. With the adrenaline slowly fading, the pain hit her like a freight train, forcing her to slow down an eventually halting her fight. Without a warning she was released and struggled to keep herself on her feet.  
"... Oh shit" Vega huffed, as he saw the aftermath of Jack's tantrum: The kid slammed through the table, back bent in a way that could in no way, under any circumstances, be healthy. He knew Jack had just acted in shock, but she clearly overdid it, tossing the kid up in the air or against a wall should've been enough, but crashing him into the table?

The crowd went silent as Jack turned to the other biotic, her eyes going wide in shock. Jack could feel her heart pounding in her chest as she watched in horror as what looked like a medic walked up to the guy and take care of him. "No...Hell no.." she mumbled to herself "What. The. Fuck." her hand slowly reached to her face, cupping both her cheeks, ignoring the stinging pain from her wound. Her right hand nervously ran over her face, rubbing her forehead, ruffling her hair in her absentmindedness.  
The bar slowly emptied as the young soldier was taken care off, Jack didn't really notice though. It wasn't the first time she broke someone's spine. No, she had done it on a regular basis before she became a teacher for biotics. And that was exactly what had terrorized her. She was a teacher for young biotics now. And just like her students, just like herself, this young soldier got overconfident in his skills and showed off. When she hurt his pride, he snapped. It was wrong of him to attack her for that, but she would have done the same, if not something even worse at his age.  
"This could have been one of my kids," she murmured outside the bar, holding back her tears.  
"I never saw you snap like that. Not even with Lawson. What the hell, Jack?" Vega asked her, still shocked from what had just happened, but his tone was also heavy with concern about her mental state. There was obviously something brewing inside of this woman, he wasn't blind.  
"... This could have been one of my kids."


End file.
